Have you ever wondered what your life might have been but for one or two events in your childhood? Think back to your childhood and take note of any memory that just pops up into your head right now. I had two specific two memories that popped up on a regular basis and I never knew their significance in my life until I got involved in tapping.
When I was four or five years old, my family lived in Chicago. As a little girl I crawled behind the couch and I found some change. I walked to the corner store, bought a box of candy, walked back home then ate the candy in front of my mother. She asked me where I got the money to buy the candy. For some reason I froze and I could not tell her that I crawled behind the couch, found a nickel and went to the store. Can you imagine a four or five year old girl child going to the store by herself these days?
My mother was not happy that I had returned home safely. She was mad thinking that I stole a box of candy. But I had to ask the store keeper for the candy which was behind a glass case at the store. That night my father came home and I still froze. I received a bare-bottom spanking and was sent to bed without dinner.
The second incident occurred what I was in second grade and had problems with arithmetic, subtracting a two digit number from a three-digit number and carrying over the tens. I could not understand what my teacher taught, but my mother helped me with my arithmetic that night.
The next day at school I told my teacher that, “I couldn’t do my homework the way you taught me, but I could do it the way my mother taught me.” She grabbed me by my arms, and in an angry voice while shaking me said, “Don’t do your homework the way your mother taught you. Do your homework the way I taught you.”
These two incidents made huge impacts on my psyche and left limiting beliefs that controlled my life for decades.
The limiting beliefs that controlled me most of my life:
- You’re dumb, you’re stupid, you’re ugly.
- You will be punished if you have money.
- You are not good at math. (I took algebra in high school; quarterly grades were D-B-C-D.)
- I avoided math classes in college.
- I flunked out of college after three semesters
- I failed accounting as a freshman in college. (However after my husband and I built our house I took five accounting classes at a community college and received A’s and B’s.)
- I never worked at a job long enough to earn a pension.
I eventually received my BS degree at a four-year year university.
These limiting beliefs were always in the background of my subconscious and caused me to not aspire for greater responsibility or authority in my work career during my earning years. I was just always an office worker.
However, ever since college, I have heard so many people tell me, “You’re the best we’ve ever had.”
Is your story similar to mine? Looking back, what one or two childhood incidents come to your mind? Write them down, look at your life and notice your life’s turns as a result of that childhood event. I had no idea until I took the time to sit down, really examine my life, and expose those beliefs that truly limited my life.
I’m ready to make changes and I’m grateful to God that He gives me His wisdom, guidance and freedom to make new choices totally apart from those limiting beliefs.